Storm Area 51 Event a Total Flop, No Aliens Freed from Captivity

Roy Batty
Daily Stormer
September 21, 2019

Epic fail, fellow gamers.

Don’t worry though, we’ll get them next round!


A viral prank that promised to see two million alien hunters breach the gates of Area 51 has ended with a whimper instead of a bang, drawing only a few dozen enthusiasts for the much-anticipated ‘raid.’

Initially a mock Facebook event, “Storm Area 51” quickly became a phenomenon that garnered interest from hundreds of thousands of netizens, who signed up to blaze past police and military guards to “see them aliens” at the top-secret Nevada facility. Some celebrities who’d promised to join in heated up the memeful event even more, while the authorities tried to pour cold water on even the idea of a peaceful alien-themed festival, calling it unsustainable.

So what epic action unfolded in the middle of the Nevada desert on Friday morning as the pulled-in reinforcements readied their rifles and K9 guards stood poised at the perimeter? Well, you guessed it – none of it.

Problem was, no one stuck to the plan.

I think it’s clear that the “Storm Area 51” event suffered from the same problem that every internet LARP movement suffers from – lack of traction when they shift from funny memes and shitposting to actual activism.

Good optics tho:

To this day, this remains mostly the case. Normies stay on their online normie farms and rarely venture outside of the comfortable confines of said places.

Going further, the simple fact of the matter is that the internet has never been inhabited by “normal” people. It has traditionally been the domain of eccentrics and autists, and this remained true pretty much right up to the point when smartphones began to ruin everything.

To this day, most young thotties simply use their phones to browse the internet, and that means staying on popular apps like Instagram or Facebook Messenger, and that’s about it.

There were a lot of memesters that no doubt found the idea amusing, but there is absolutely no way that an internet meme could make it into an IRL successful event – this simply hasn’t ever been done. To be fair, the Alt-Right came closest but flew a little bit too close to the sun and couldn’t control its cringe factor.

I think that we will continue to see online meme movements try to make the jump into IRL with the same results.

See, no one has worked the formula out yet.

Whoever pulls this off will be the next great political genius. We’re talking on the same level as Lenin, Hitler or Eren Yeager.